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The trap is selfishness, the bait is offense, and the only way out is love. Love seeks the truth and sees life inside out. Fear sees life outside in. All fear cares about is what you do and how it makes it feel. Love also has feelings, but it stops and considers why you did what you did. It seeks truth and refuses to let offense lead it to be defensive. Fear is either the plaintiff or the defendant. Love sits on the jury of its own life. Luke 6:35, “But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, …

In the name of love our children are being led to their own suffering. It’s not love to demand respect. Love doesn’t expect anything from anyone but itself. Love puts itself last not first, and it does not demand its own way. Fear does all of that. Love’s worst enemy in our lives is our own feelings. Don’t follow your feelings, they will lead you astray. Love seeks the truth at all cost. The truth is often hidden, but it’s never hard to find. If we look at the truth and willingly ignore it, we a …

Just out living our suffering doesn’t ensure we grow stronger for it. How we move through it determines if we grow stronger or not. Loving through our suffering means still doing what is “truly” best for others without regard for ourself. Loving when we are suffering is extremely difficult. Suffering makes a five pound weight a hundred and five pound weight, but fighting to lift a heavier weight is what makes us stronger. When we keep fighting to live a loving life even in our suffering, then Go …

I have done and so often see people saying they are doing things in the name of God when in reality, it’s the opposite of what God would have me or them do. It’s also far too common to give Satan credit for what the law of God is enforcing. When we pay a price for sin, it’s a blessing not a curse. When we get what we want for selfishness, it’s a curse not a blessing. God won’t bless selfishness because He loves us. If we are unsure if we are following the Holy Spirit or our own feelings, we shou …

Loving others or someone else does not require we love ourself...thank God! I got over myself years ago, and it was the best decision I ever made. We are not the origin of love. To believe we are is to suggest we are our own god. We are not the Creator! We are the creation. Jesus is love! When we love Him and come to fully understand His love for us we are left with a desire to love others, and He teaches us how to love them. It’s the whole reason I do every one of these posts. His love for me d …

A loving man won’t be loving all the time. He will blow it and be rough around the edges, but he won’t defend his own selfishness. More often than not he will be loving. There is not a fiber of his being that can ignore the verbal or physical abuse of women. If another man is verbally or physically abusing a woman in his presence he will stop it or die trying. We need more loving men in this world! Jesus is our example! Galatians 5:22-26, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuf …

Grieving is important. Moving on too fast can be just as damaging as not moving on at all. There is a grieving process, and the time it takes to move on will depend on how much we lost. Moving on doesn’t mean what we lost has no value. It means giving value to what we lost by how we live moving forward, and allow love to continually rule our lives. Whether we are moving on from selfishness or love, God wants to use it all for our good and the good of those we love. He can if we let Him. Don’t ru …

The first thing we need to consider before we speak into someone’s life is....what is the likely result of us speaking. Then we should consider how should we speak. The answer is always to speak in a way the other person is most likely to understand what we really mean. In other words, just saying what we think or speaking our mind is not always loving. Sometimes it’s selfish. We should never just speak our mind. We should speak the truth for others sake which means we must deliver the message i …

Hurt requires sacrifice. I do my best to explain how this works in “The Right Fight” with real life examples and visual illustrations. This truth has helped me get in....the fight to live a loving life. If you hurt me, I have no choice but to either love (absorb the hurt) or fear (make you pay the price for the hurt). If I make you pay the price and I don’t forgive, we both lose. If however, I absorb the hurt, I now have an opportunity to speak truth into your life. I can tell you I forgive you, …

Feeling love for someone is not equal to loving them. Many times the feeling of love is the fruit of love. It can also be infatuation, or a strong desire for someone or something for what we can gain. We may also feel love for someone we actually love. It is so important we know the difference. Love doesn’t expect anything in return. If we love ourselves we expect to be loved. This trap destroys so many relationships. “The Right Fight” takes at look at this from many angles and digs deeper to th …